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10 January 2016 @ 01:52 am
It's a late night in July of 2015, and I've just returned from an evening out with my girlfriends. A little tipsy and in want of company, I called Tony, hoping he wouldn't mind if I came over.

Of course he didn't.

He answered the door in his pajamas. I remember thinking, Wow. He's so. Fucking. Cute.

After leading me to his room, he kissed me, telling me how beautiful I looked in my dress. I pulled off my heels, joined him in bed, and kissed him gently.

"Can I tell you something...?" I asked, eyes cast downward, ashamed.
"Is everything okay?" Tony asked, trying to look me in the eyes.
"Yes... I just don't want you to be upset with me," I said.
"What is it?"

I took a deep breath, mustering my courage.

"I... I went on a date with someone recently," I said, guilt plastered across my face.
Tony watched me carefully, before calmly responding, "Did you?"
"Yes... Are you mad...?"
"... No. I'm just... Why are you telling me this?"
"I don't know. Because I like you. And because I thought you should know. And because I felt bad for doing it. I felt like I was lying to you, and I don't want to lie." I rambled, the truth spilling out.
"Well... What did you think?"
"It taught me that I really like you. You're so much better than him. You're better than anyone I've ever met or dated before in my life, and honestly, I was just scared that what we have is too good to be true. Wanderlust was so amazing with you. I didn't want to put all my eggs in one basket, and I just wanted to look out for myself and not rush this, but--"
"If you want to be my girlfriend," he started, "I would really, really, really like that."

Holy shit.
He said it.
He wanted to be with me.

I remember smiling. I remember kissing him. I remember thinking, Did he just ask me to be his girlfriend?
I couldn't tell.
So I didn't say anything.
I just kissed him. I kissed him for a really long time.

A few nights later, I was introducing him to my friend Rachel, and we were all out watching one of his buddies (who's in a popular band) perform at a small bar called Neck of the Woods in San Francisco.

We took a shot or two.
We danced together.
He kept wiggling up to me, being sexy, trying to get me to dance with him, too.

When my cup ran dry, I mentioned I was going to the bar for a refill, and he insisted he come with me. On the way there, he stopped me, spun me around, and kissed me again.

"Cheri, I really want you to be my girlfriend."
I remember laughing, shoving him a little, and smiling at him as he stumbled a step. He smiled back at me, leaning in to hear as I yelled to him over the live music, "You can't keep saying that, Tony! If you want me to be your girlfriend, you have to ask me!"

He leaned closer, then. He took my face in his hands. He said, "Cheri, you're amazing. I have so much fun with you. You would make me the happiest man alive if you said yes to me. Will you be my girlfriend?"
I smiled. I smiled so big. Finally. FINALLY, Tony. "Yes, Tony. I'll be your girlfriend."
"Yes!!" He closed his eyes, grabbing at the air and gently pumping a victorious fist. When he heard me laugh, he looked at me, then gave me the sweetest, most lovely kiss. My boyfriend. My Tony.

He was so. Fucking. Amazing.
He still is.
I'm so fucking lucky.
I am so. Fucking. Lucky.
09 January 2016 @ 02:59 pm
Watching Tony play golf is, I think, the sexiest thing I've ever seen. Growing up, Tony played every sport -- skiing, snowboarding, football, wrestling, basketball, etc -- to the point where he played so aggressively and competitively that he tore his ACL. Twice. :/ Golf is the only sport he can really play competitively anymore that doesn't injure his knee any further than he already has.

The other players approach our golf cart with nothing but compliments for him. When his ball lands, I hear "Wow"s and "That's amazing" from the other 3 on the tee. He returns to me in a strut, smiling, trying not to look too proud. That would be rude, after all.

"I'm so glad you're here with me," he whispers in my ear, softly, politely. "Normally when I'm out here, I'm cursing under my breath. So serious. But with you here, I can't stop laughing. I'm having so much fun."

He kisses me.
I kiss him back.

On one hole, he returns to me and says, "Jackie Chan is in town."
"No he's not," I say, smiling, knowing he's fucking with me. He knows I'm the biggest Jackie Chan fan ever (Jackie's corny humor and smile reminds me so much of my dad).
"Didn't you say Jackie was in town?" Tony asks the elder gentleman playing with us as he also returns to his cart.
"Yesterday!" He replies, smiling, launching into a speech about how he's producing the new Bruce Lee movie in San Francisco.
Yesterday, I mouth at Tony accusingly, pointing a finger at him.
He points back at me, menacing, and we laugh together.

We're always laughing.
I wonder if it's annoying.
I don't care.
01 January 2016 @ 01:47 pm
"Yes?" I turn around from putting my makeup away, pulling the sheer sleeve of my black kimono up and over my shoulder, feeling a little self conscious. It's the first time I've dressed up and done my makeup, much less gotten ready to "go out", in a *long* time.
"I just want to look at you," he says, giving me a slow once over from the doorway of our bedroom.
"You are so fucking sexy." He approaches me, running his hands down my dress.
I smile. "Did you forget I clean up well?"
"You look so good. Kiss me."
Laughing, I kiss him.
"Wow," he says, rubbing the skin of my arms.

We've gotten into a routine. We stay home, relax, don't spend money, eat really good food, and lay around in our pajamas and bathrobes all day playing video games or watching movies. New Year's Eve was such a good night to dress up together, look fancy, and remind each other of what it felt like to first meet. He hasn't seen me wear makeup, a pretty dress, or high heels in nearly 4 months. Every other minute, he'd walk up to me and kiss me, whispering to me how beautiful I was.

It was nice.

At one of the parties we attended, he came up to me to tell me a story.

"That guy over there," Tony began, pointing at the boy who'd just introduced himself to me. "He said, 'I'm gonna' ask Cheri if she wants to smoke this joint.' And I literally looked him in the face and said, 'That's my girlfriend, and she doesn't smoke pot anymore, and she's not going to say yes to you.' And the dude looked at me, back at the joint in his hand, then back at me, and said, 'I'm gonna ask her anyway.'"
I burst out laughing, running my fingers through his hair. "Baby..."
"What was I gonna' say?" Tony laughed. "I was like, okay, you can try, but I know her answer already. Dude has balls."
"I love you."

The night went on like that.

Tony would get up to grab a drink for us, or a glow stick, or whatever, and someone would sit next to me to try and talk to me, fully knowing that Tony was there with me. Tony would say, "Excuse me, that's my seat", and the person would go on, pretending Tony wasn't talking, acting like he didn't exist, continuing to chat me up. And Tony was such a good sport about it. Because I'd look at him, and smile, and give him a helpless shrug like, I'm sorry babe; I can't control other people. And he'd smile back at me, because he knows how much I love him. And he'd give me a little nod of his head like, Get over here. And I'd politely excuse myself, get up, take his arm, and he'd gently take me and kiss me forever.

I love him.

... Last New Years was terrible. The New Year before that was awful. And I can't tell you how many abusive boyfriends I've dated who would make me miserable over the holidays.

I am so grateful for Tony. I am so grateful to have met him in 2015, and to have brought in the New Year with a kiss from him in 2016. My family loves him to pieces, and so do I. He has such an amazing heart, and I am so, so thankful.

Happy New Year.
22 December 2015 @ 04:35 pm

After weeks of healthy eating (spicy shrimp and kale sweet potato skillets, avocado kale eggs in coconut oil, greek yogurt parfaits, greek yogurt dips, chilli-rubbed salmon with avocado salsa, home made shisito peppers), Tony and I are finally down to the dreggs of our pantry. With Christmas on the way, spending money on groceries right now would just be wasteful, especially since we'll be eating with family over the holidays.

I have about a million different spices, frozen ground beef, onions, jarred pasta sauce, butter, wheat noodles, etc -- it should be easy to kick up the pasta sauce with sauteed minced garlic, red pepper flakes, oregano, basil, onions, and ground beef. But man ... I wish we were making it from scratch. :/ What I wouldn't give to make my own pasta sauce. This feels like cheating.


We'll make do with what we have on hand.

17 October 2015 @ 10:25 am
TONY: "I just don't like it when people touch my face."
ME: Pouting, "Okay. I won't do it anymore."

2 minutes later, Tony regrets telling me that, and is literally chasing my hands with his cheeks while yelling, "TOUCH MEEEE!!"